It's all about you!

It's all about you!

 

Or? 

 

 

Years ago when I had just finished university, I attended a Theatre Under The Stars production in Stanley Park.  I was with my friend and we were enjoying the great summer evening and looking forward to watching some fun theatre.  While waiting for the show to begin I caught the eye of a beautiful young woman sitting a few rows in front of me.  She was sitting with an older woman who I later learned was her grandmother. The young woman was simply incredible and during the break, I made my way toward her and introduced myself and asked if maybe we could go out sometime.  She gave me her phone number and the very next day I gave her a call. She was still in university and working downtown for the summer and we arranged to meet for lunch. The day we met was a wonderful warm day and we got some take-away and sat in a downtown park to eat and get to know each other. 

I was so nervous and so intent on impressing her I pulled out all the stops. I wore my best suit and spent the entire hour telling her about all of my accomplishments and achievements and basically outlining what a great person I was!

 

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised when I did'nt get a second date. I made the first one about me! Not really a fun experience for her, I'm sure.

 

The strange part is that in my mind it was not all about me. I wasn't talking about me because I was so into myself or because I was so conceited but rather because I was really into her. 

 

If she had known how much I liked her, I am positive we would have had a second date and we would be living in Kerrisdale with three children today! Well, maybe not.

 

The amazing thing is that this is the same mistake that many salespeople and businesses make everyday.

 

They want business, but instead of listening to the prospect, they talk and talk and talk about themselves. In the end, the prospect feels that they are not understood and that their business is not important.

 

The answer?

 

Make it all about them!

 

It does not matter whether you are talking to your customers, your employees, your children or any group or individual. If you make it about them, your success

rate with rise.

 

I don't mean by this that you should talk about them but rather that you should focus on them. 

 

Everyone feels better when

they've got attention.

 

I worked with a man named Dave Hewitt for many years at Crayola.  Staff, customers and suppliers all admired Dave. The reason was not that he was a softie, but rather because he gave everyone one hundred percent of his attention. 

 

I remember one particular

meeting with Dave that exemplified this. I wanted an hour or so of his time to propose a detailed plan of mine and hoped to get his approval on it.

 

Instead I got five minutes

and a no!

 

How did I feel?

 

I felt great!

 

Dave gave me five minutes of his time in which he listened to me attentively - more attentively than anyone else ever has - and he confirmed that he understood my situation.  He then went on to explain why the answer would

be no.  

 

He then left me, with the entire conversation taking no longer

than five minutes. Instead of

being upset I felt better about myself, the organization and the relationship that my company had with Crayola.  

 

Dave made it completely about me!

 

Do this with your employees, your suppliers and your customers and your business will go more smoothly.

 

People will like you more and will want to spend more time around you.  Employees and customers will become more loyal and suppliers will give you priority.

 

How to achieve this skill?

 

It requires focus.  Dave Hewitt had been a US Navy Seal and I am sure that was the source of his focus. The most important thing is to realize that others are equally as important as you and their concerns deserve our focus and attention.

 

Focus on others and you will bring the spotlight onto yourself!